Tuesday, September 7, 2010

my daughter brooke, age 6....

i know i have been obnoxiously showing this photo around.  sorry if you have seen it on twitter, facebook, etc.....but i have been going through old photos lately (because i am putting together a video for jenny doh's crescendoh site) when i came upon some awesome photos of my family that i kinda forgot about.  this one of brooke is so true to her nature - it makes me so happy to see it and remember her as a child -such a joy - all her life.  she is now 33 and beautiful inside and out.  
brooke is always a happy, enthusiastic person.  she is always been eager to please and make sure everyone is comfortable.  even in the most fearsome of circumstances she is upbeat, unflappable.  which sometimes showed in her voice as a radio news announcer.  she had to learn to keep her voice downbeat for the more dire news. 

but she also very smart.  and funny.  she has given me such fulfillment all her life that i doubt i could find the right words.  people who know me know i am not maudlin or romantic-fantasy minded.  when i say she gave me (and still does) such great joy, i really mean it.

brooke and i moved to england when she was only 2 1/2.  i had divorced her dad and immediately  a hotly battled custody war began.  it was january 1980  the month that  "joint legal custody" became law in california.  lawyers were really flexing their stuff encouraging dads to take an active stand in the area of physical custody.  it was a noble idea and it worked well for many families but in the beginning the idea was sold idea to many dads when they heard they would not have to pay child support or at least a reduced child support if they shared physical custody. 
then what hatched were new accusations that fit the guidelines for the court to determine who had custody.  one such proposition is one party showing the other party is an unfit parent.  an unfit parent described by court as one who behaves improperly in front of the child (for one thing).  parents accused each other of child molestation, neglect, drug abuse or other totally outrageous or unseemly behavior in front of the child.  courts always want to split the baby; rule in the best interest of the child, not the parent. which makes for some real hysterical and desperate accusation to sprout out of the custody battle especially when one parent does not want to share the child with the other parent....  luckily we did not have such a nasty fight as this, but still it was pretty nasty.
it was also during the year of "kramer vs. kramer", the movie that brought me to tears in the early 1980's - in her case the issue was abandonment.  but in the end you can see that there is no real happy ending.
by the tie this photo was taken of broke she had a full middle class engish accent.  she was still dressing as an english school girl.  what brooke says about this photo?  she says she was pretending to be the queen of england.  
her other comment was - she thinks she was saying "five minutes to air".  radio news talk.


priti.lisa said...

If every Mother enjoyed and praised their children half as much...imagine.
This is a beautiful post.
My daughter was the answer to my prayers...and my son saved my life.
I am a quiet person, but I managed to fight and borrow to keep sole custody...the best money I ever spent.
They are 15 and 20 now. And my best joy :)

lisa bebi said...

priti.lisa you are awesome. i am glad to know you - such a good mom. so you know the joy of motehrhood. its priceless.

Tess said...

Your daughter was such a cutie pie, the photo is precious. Now let's see it altered, or dare you?!

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